Sermon Notes
Kingdom Christians:
I. Keep their _________ (v. 31-37)
A. In _________ (v. 31-32)
B. Before _________ (v. 33-37)
II. Do not _________ (v. 38-48)
A. _________ enemies (v. 38-42)
B. _________ enemies (v. 43-48)
How do we love enemies?
1. With our _________
2. _________ for them
Going Deeper
- Read Matthew 5:31-32 and Deut. 24:1. Now read Matthew 19:3-9. Douglas O’Donnell says: “This conservative-liberal controversy over the meaning of ‘indecency’ as a grounds for divorce was the backdrop of the Pharisees’ coming to Jesus about this matter. They were obviously trying to draw Jesus into the long-standing debate and then exploit his response for their own ends. Some
even think they were hoping to use Jesus’ answer to get him in trouble with Herod because a negative answer would publicly align him with the point of view that caused John the Baptist to be beheaded. - Commentators W. D. Davies and Dale Allison say: “Jesus’ purpose was not to lay down the law, but to reassert an ideal and make divorce a sin, thereby disturbing their current complacency.”
- What is marriage? Stott: “Marriage…is a divine institution by which God makes permanently one two people who decisively and publicly leave their parents in order to form a new unit of society and they ‘become one flesh.’”
- Douglas O’Donnell says: “The marital relationship is supremely sacred. Nothing can sever it but unrepentant unfaithfulness—and then it is…the sorrowful ground of divorce.”
- The exception Jesus gives is sexual immorality (porneia). This covers all sexual sin, all sexual intimacy outside marriage between man and woman (Lev. 18:22; 20:13; Judg. 19:22–26; Rom. 1:24–27; 1 Cor. 5:1–13; 6:9).
- Craig Blomberg gives governing principles for divorce and remarriage:
1) Both infidelity and abandonment destroy the basic components of marriage
2) Both leave one party without any options if attempts at reconciliation are spurned
3) Both use divorce as a last resort - Read Judges 11:30-39. What oath did Jephthah make? How was it foolish?
- Read Matthew 23:16-22. How are the Pharisees guilty of oaths?
- There is a place for oaths to be made. Dan Doriani: “Paul put himself under oath, calling God as his witness (Rom. 1:9; 2 Cor. 1:23; 1 Thess. 2:10). So, for the sake of people who cannot know they are reliable, disciples may take vows. Similarly, disciples may take vows in courtrooms or to enter military or political service. In commerce, they may enter into contracts, which resemble secularized oaths.” When is it wrong to make an oath?
- Dan Doriani: “Jesus teaches that we should be so true to our words that the need for oaths disappears.” Are you truthful in all you say?
- John Stott pairs divorce and oaths together: “If divorce is due to human hard-heartedness, swearing is due to human untruthfulness. Both were permitted by the law; neither was commanded; neither should be necessary.”
- Read Matthew 5:39-42. Christians should not retaliate. How are you tempted to retaliate? What will you do to change this mindset this week?
- Read Romans 12:19-21. What is the instruction? What should we do? Augustine: “Many have learned how to offer the other cheek, but do not know how to love him by whom they were struck.”
- Read Luke 10:25-37. How is the Samaritan an example of loving an enemy?
- Dan Doriani says, “Step by step, Jesus’ commands grow more arduous. He tells his disciples first to be faithful to a beloved spouse (5:31–32), second to be truthful with neighbors (vv. 33–37), third to be merciful to those who do harm (vv. 38–42), fourth to do good to enemies, who intend harm (vv. 43–47), and finally to be perfect, like God (v. 48).”
- Read Matthew 5:43-48. Alfred Plummer says, “To return evil for good is devilish; to return good for good is human; to return good for evil is divine. To love as God loves is moral perfection.”
A Summation of Biblical Teaching on Divorce and Remarriage by Douglas S. O’Donnell
The Bible allows divorce for two reasons—marital unfaithfulness such as adultery and homosexuality (Matt. 5:32; 19:9), and the desertion of a believer by an unbelieving spouse (1 Cor. 7:10-15)
As to the question of remarriage, the Scriptures allow it in three instances. First, if one’s mate is guilty of sexual immorality and is unwilling to repent and live faithfully with the marriage partner, divorce and remarriage are permissible. Second, when a believer is deserted by an unbelieving spouse, divorce and remarriage are again permitted. And third, as an extension of the allowance for divorce and remarriage when deserted by an unbeliever, I personally believe that when someone has been married and divorced before coming to Christ, remarriage is allowed. Second Corinthians 5:17 says, “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” “New” here (kainos) means new in quality. “New” means what it says—really new, as contrasted to the old. The same word is used of the “new man” in Ephesians 2:15 and the “new self” in Ephesians 4:24. Not only are believers really new, but Paul says that “the old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” A new believer is completely forgiven. I believe that among the old things that have passed away are all sins, including divorce prior to salvation. If it were otherwise, divorce would be the only sin for which Christ did not atone, and that would be inconceivable.
I hope no one misunderstands me, for divorce is not the ideal. It is a divine concession to human weakness. God hates divorce! We must realize that divorce (and remarriage) according to the Biblical guidelines is not sin—though it is due to sin. We must mourn every divorce!
How foreign to the Biblical mind are phrases like “creative divorce” or “the magic of divorce” or the ad that appeared on the back of a TV Guide: “Order your DIVORCE RING BAND today. . . . Now is the time to celebrate your new beginning.”
We have discussed the issues primarily with the nonoffending party in view. What advice is there for the offending party? Here I can do no better than quote the concluding words of Dr. Martyn Lloyd-Jones:
“Have you nothing to say about others?” asks someone. All I would say about them is this, and I say it carefully and advisedly, and almost in fear lest I give even a semblance of a suggestion that I am saying anything that may encourage anyone to sin. But on the basis of the gospel and in the interest of truth I am compelled to say this: Even adultery is not the unforgivable sin. It is a terrible sin, but God forbid that there should be anyone who feels that he or she has sinned himself or herself outside the love of God or outside His kingdom because of adultery. No; if you truly repent and realize the enormity of your sin and cast yourself upon the boundless love and mercy and grace of God, you can be forgiven and I assure you of pardon. But hear the words of our blessed Lord: “Go and sin no more."
Finally, what do we say to the church, to ourselves? First, we must resist the permissiveness of our culture and solidly take our stand against divorce or remarriage on any grounds other than those taught in God’s Word. Next, we must refrain from self-righteous judgmentalism. All of us are adulterers in heart. We must exercise our dealings with those who have fallen, realizing that we are ourselves under Christ’s omniscient dictum: “But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matthew 5:28). Finally, toward those who have fallen to or suffered divorce, we must be forgiving, like our Lord. We must not call unclean that which he has called clean (Acts 10:15). We must endeavor to share the suffering of those ravaged by divorce. And lastly, the church should make provision for the remarriage of those who have Biblically divorced.
